Saturday, March 25, 2006

On again, off again...

Good Morning! Frequently, when I come here thinking I might post, the site won't allow me to write. No cursor. Hitting keys accomplishes nothing. It's frustrating, and I'm not blog-wise enough to know how to work around it. So, Cassie, here is your new post. And it is exciting! I wish an experienced blogger would tell me how to make paragraphs. When I hit return to space down for a new paragraph, the cursor disappears and nothing happens. It is a wonderful Saturday morning, after a hideous week -- I'll be meeting with my Lenten Study group this morning, and having tea with good friends this afternoon. I so need a day of good things. Last weekend was cut quite short because I spent 8 hours on Saturday in a class called, Non-Violent Physical Crisis Intervention. This was a class in learning to restrain students safely. I've been doing it all wrong. Mind you, I'm a school counselor, not a cop, not a prison guard. And in the last couple of weeks, my two elementary schools have had to call police 3 times for out-of-control students. In my 19 year career, I have been involved in restrains no more than 3 times, which is good. One of those involved a special ed student with a behavior disorder. The other two times were with a little guy who was playing us. The smarter thing for us to do would have been to say, "Go ahead. Run. I'm not chasing you." Instead, we played into his game. In my sphere, restraining a child is just not really needed, but it is good to know what to do if something ever happens. Meanwhile, I'm just feeling a lot of stress in general. I miss having a dog. I'm feeling just a little lonely around the house (the last time I felt like this ended in a disastrous pseudo-marriage, so I'm not leaving home). And I don't like the nail color I got yesterday. I notice my kids always post about specific subjects. I just seem to ramble...

Saturday, March 11, 2006


I have things to do and I don't want to do them. Well, mostly I mean work. Although I love my job, I hate having to go to work. It seriously interferes with things I would rather do. I would rather xstitch, or maybe paint or write. I meet with a group of friends on alternate Saturday mornings. We do a study, and are in our second year. Today, though, we began a Lenten study. As we discussed our topic, what it means to be People of Peace, I had wonderful ideas for poetry and watercolor. One of the ladies has suggested I should be writing short essays about life. She says I'm a wonderful writer. I just love her. I did anyway, but it sure is nice to hear comments like that. If I live long enough to retire, it would be nice to be able to continue to earn with my art and writing. Speaking of art, I had a brochure today in the mail about a Letters of Joy workshop coming up in May. It's geared toward calligraphers, and includes a lot of art classes -- many calligraphers like to do artwork to illustrate their calligraphy. I did belong to the Tacoma Calligraphy Guild for a couple of years, but found it too difficult to get to the monthly meetings. I miss it. I miss being surrounded by other creative people. The drawing to the upper left is a pen and ink I did several years ago. It is the old farmhouse my grandma lived in, where my dad and his brother and sister grew up. The old place is gone now, sadly. Once in a while, though, I still can smell the cool, earthen cellar where grandma kept her eggs. Each day she gathered eggs from the chicken coop, washed them, and stored them. She had regular customers who came by for them. There isn't quite as much of that any more.

Thursday, March 2, 2006

A little closure

A week ago I was still rattled by the homicide down the street. came a little closer to closing that episode. Associated Ministries conducted a Moment of Blessing. This is a short, powerful ceremony conducted by pastors and lay people and can include anyone who is interested. Today's blessing was attended by several of us who spent the night on the bus together last week, neighbors. It is a ceremony of prayer and blessing to reclaim the area, the neighborhood, from the violence that profaned it. Several friends from my church joined me and my DD.

That very same house had been Home to me and my children for a few years. For me it had been a safe place, a haven, and I felt almost violated by the killing. Tonight I feel like I have some closure. It will never be "over." A murder can't just go away. His fiance, his children, may never completely recover. My heart grieves for what his family is suffering because of the decision one woman made in a moment of anger and drunkenness. She can't ever take it back. There is no way to undo a murder. Yet it feels like my little neighborhood has been washed clean. The police hosed the blood off the street when they finished processing the scene last week. Now our neighborhood is clean again.